Pondering the Rules of Life

You pick up some random information  when you travel the world – especially when you end up in weird situations like I have. You start mentally collecting a set of observations  that you come to expect as you unwittingly form your own stereotypes.  A series of truths that are almost  as true as “Don’t Drink the Tap Water.”

So, I present to you the first installment of FUN FACTS:

• While Somali pirates may have money but they have a seriously stymied sense of style. You can spot a pirate in a Nairobi club a mile away by his checkered pants and Michael Jackson shirt.
• Germans are really not as cool as you think they are. And no one really thinks Germans are cool (except for maybe Austrians)… But I still like to party with them.
• People from New Zealand are really strange. Awesome, but strange.
• You can almost always tell what country most tourists are from by looking at them from the knees down (hint: Japanese women will always wear heels. Even in the mud; Americans love white socks and Tevos, Germans love Birkenstocks and black socks; Koreans are really into nude hose and Australians often have dirty feet which are, for some reason, usually bare).
• No matter how low the GDP of a country you are in, you will always find someone living REALLY WELL – like at the 5 star Hotel Karibe in Haiti (which was open two days after the big earthquake), The Sheiks in Iraq (who bring Persian Glamour to a whole ‘nother level) , a mid-level government minister’s mansion in Kenya, or the summer homes of the sons/daughters of the government just outside of Bamako.
• The right wing Muslims, Jews and Christians are all insanely similar – especially when it comes to their “protection” of women. But don’t tell them that – they’ll kill you. Literally.

More tomorrow!